Friday, October 28, 2005

Anoop Dogg - Drop It Like a FOB

(Quicktime 6.31 MB)

If you have a lot of chest hair,
Show it like a FOB*,
Immigration coming to get you,
Marry like a FOB,
I've got the champals on my feet,
when im walking down the street,
and I make the best saag**,
when I want something to eat
I am a nice FOB,
I work in the IT***,
When you call tech support,
You will get me.
I am a bachelor,
And I work hard,
Come and marry me
So I can get the Green-card.
White people, they can’t understand me,
Their jobs are now in New Delhi.

* FOB, Freshly Off the Boat, aka. newly arrived immigrants.
** Saag (or Sag), an Indian spinach dish.
*** IT, information technology.

Monday, October 24, 2005

Asian Backstreet Boys

Two Asian Chinese boys have made a spoof music video of Backstreet Boys' song "As Long As You Love Me".

Frankly these two boys are quite talented.

Not only two of them have performed a song that usually required five white boys with ear pieces, their soundtrack did not skip like Milli Vanilli's during 1990 Grammy Awards.

The duo's name is called 后舍男生 or in English "Back Dormitory Boys". Their spoof music videos have been selected by Motorola China to promote mobile phones.

The Back Dorm Boys are 韦炜 (Wei Wei, height 189 cm or 6'2") and 黄艺馨 (Huang Yi Xin, height 173 cm or 5'8"). They are university students at 广州美术学院 (Guangzhou Arts Institute) majoring in Scupltures.

The third dorm mate in the background is 肖静 (Xiao Jing) and in most of the videos he was playing the computer game "Counter Strike". Here are more info and pictures of them for those who are interested.

Video #1 "As Long As You Love Me" by Backstreet Boys.

Video #2 "I Want It That Way" by Backstreet Boys.

Video #3 "Get Down (You Are The One For Me)" by Backstreet Boys.

Video #4 is a promotional video they performed live at a TV or Radio station. I don't know any details. If someone does, please feel free to comment or email me.

Video #5 "Radio In My Head" by Pu Shu.

Video #6 "童話" (English translation "Fairytale") by a Malaysian singer 光良 (Guang Liang, he is also known as Michael Wong). At the end of the video, or the end of the "blooper" section, they are performing "Superstar" by S.H.E.

Video #7 "分开旅行" (English translation "Travel Separately") by 刘若英.

Video #8 Video of them performing live at 21CN 中國首屆華語網絡歌手大賽 on Oct. 31, 2005.

Video #9 "不得不爱" (or in English "Irresistible Love") by 潘玮柏 (or in English "Wilbur Pan").

If you are looking for mp3 files of the Chinese songs, is the place to go.

Saturday, October 22, 2005

Dear Mr. Courtland Milloy

Dear Mr. Courtland Milloy,

You sir are one fucking retard misinformed individual.

In Oct .19th, 2005 issue of Washington Post, you have spent 720 words on an article titled "No Misnamed Panda Could Be The Cat's Meow" rambling about the name of new panda cub Tai Shan (泰山), which you thought “Ty Shawn” would be more fitting for the male panda cub since “Tai” is a girl’s name.

I believe your intention was to have the original article to be somewhat "tongue-in-cheek", but the article ended up making you sound like a fool. Regardless, I would like to seize this opportunity to point out several things to you:

1. Tai Shan (泰山) is a very masculine male Chinese name. It is also a mountain of historical and cultural significance located north of the city of Tai'an (泰安), in Shandong Province, China. It is one of the "five sacred mountains of China". Associated with sunrise, birth, and renewal, it is often regarded the foremost of these. The temples on its slopes have been a destination for pilgrims for 3,000 years.

2. The young man you mentioned in the beginning of your article, who sells DVD out of his car, is only doing that so he can get enough money for next crack fix. I don’t think he would be a valid source to verify if “Tai Shan” is a girly name or not. Unless it is because you are desperately seeking for someone to agree with you.

3. The reason Panda are called Xiongmao (熊貓), aka. “Giant Cat Bear”, is because its unique front paws. Each front paw has a "thumb" and five fingers; the "thumb" is actually a modified wrist-bone, similar to common house felines’ front paws (thumb with four fingers).

I am also curious about the significance behind your name “Courtland”. In case you did not know, “Courtland” is a related name of “Courteney” or “Courtney”, which was from surname meaning, "from the court," "born at court," or, "from the enclosed land." I don't know about anyone else, but to me, "Courtland/Courtney" is a pretty gay lame name.

How do you like your own name now, you punk ass faggot ignorant doo-doo head!


tiangotlost at gmail dot com

Ps. Don’t forget to email me the invitation to your Kwanzaa party.

Update 1: I was pleasantly surprised to see my rant have been posted on Washington Post, next to Milloy's original article. Thanks Technorati!

Update 2: The word "faggot" has multiple meanings.

In modern day, "faggot" is being used as an offensive and insulting term for a homosexual man. It would also mean "a bundle of sticks or branches", "a sewing style"; and as a verb, it means "to tie or bind together".

I would like to assure everyone, when I used the word "faggot" or the term "punk ass faggot", I was referring him as "a bundle of sticks". Similar to the term "dumb as a box of rocks".

Update 3: I have toned down some of the profanities I used in the original. Since we are living in a civilized world, therefore there is no need to shout at each other with profanities, unless you are the President or Vice President.

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

A Tribute to Funky Buddha

Funky Buddha, a member of New York Chinese rap group Notorious MSG, was gunned down on Oct. 2, 2005.

Police has no leads.

I made this music video as a tribute to Funky Buddha.

Update: It is rumored that the death of Funky Buddha may be a giant hoax.

Especially considering the band Notorious MSG is a parody of Notorious B.I.G. Many of their songs were modeled after other well-known rap songs, and their music video of “Straight out of Canton” is a spoof of NWA’s “Straight Outta Compton” and Beastie Boy’s “Sabotage”.

Regardless, I think choosing P. Diddy’s “I’ll Be Missing You” as the song track for the tribute video is well deserved.

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

Kung Fu on Crack

In the city of Hangzhou, China, taxi drivers are being taught with a “specialized” self defense course.

In this “promotional” video, the founder/instructor of the school demonstrates several ways to handle hostile situations by pretending to be a wild chimp with rabies and high on crack.

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Pretentious Douche Bag with Apple iMac G5 at a Coffee Shop

Pretentious Douche Bag with Apple iMac G5 at a Coffee Shop 1039

I am sure there are many good reasons for you to drag your newly purchased 25 lbs with 20” display Apple iMac G5 to a coffee shop.

1. Poor vision; must need large display (rumor says too much masturbation would cause eye sight deterioration).

2. Cheap; don’t want to spend extra monthly fee for a broadband connection at home.

3. Broke; iMac G5 is price tagged at $1,799.


You are just a pretentious douche bag with a greasy rat-tail front-to-back comb-over. Perhaps you think if you would flash your new toy at a coffee shop you would make new friends.

Wrong, you lonely miserable fuck.

No one was impressed by your new toy. Most of them think you are an inconsiderate selfish slime bag that takes up valuable table space.

Pretentious Douche Bag with Apple iMac G5 at a Coffee Shop 1038

Pretentious Douche Bag with Apple iMac G5 at a Coffee Shop 1037

Wednesday, October 5, 2005

CNNN - On the Streets of America

CNNN host asks average Americans which countries United States should invade next in order to curb terrorism.

Many Americans can't even find these so-called "terrorist" states on the map, and they proved their own ignorance by placing markers on the continent of Australia.